Saturday, June 21, 2014
Matter (Heroes Fanfic - WIP)
Thursday, April 24, 2014
Blink
Sunday, March 2, 2014
Zach Walker, Vampire Hunter
- Vampires exist as fantasy only, and no such thing has ever walked the earth
- Zack's vampirism is a result of a mutation brought on by his mother's extensive drug usage while he was still developing
- The humans that Zack infects are known as Vampites
- Zack's heart and nervous system are designed as such that he doesn't need to breathe or eat, and blood-sucking is only a measure needed in events of great injury
- Vampirism is contracted by sexual intercourse with a carrier
- Sunlight makes a vampite weak, and kills one if more than 50% of their skin is exposed to the sun for more than 30 minutes. They can walk out in the sun for an indefinite amount of time if ALL of their skin is covered, but they are still weakened from the UV rays coming through their clothing
- Vampites are not "undead" humans. Vampites are a mutation of the human genome, and as such can still be impregnated by humans, as well as impregnate humans. The baby in either situation has a 1 in 500^3 chance of survival
- Silver is not deadly to a vampite, but does cause considerable amounts of pain. Vampites are known to use silver-tipped needles to tattoo themselves, since the silver burns through their skin and allows the ink to take without being rejected
Monday, February 10, 2014
Cartman is a Jew
"Is he really that ignorant?"
"Yes, he really is. He doesn't know anything, and makes no effort to learn anything. His head is so far up his fat ass, it popped out on top of his neck where it started!"
"That kind of ignorance is nearly handicap status worthy!"
- Kyle's mother runs a geneology program through her family tree, and finds out that they are distant relatives of Jesus Christ. Eric's mother uses the same program and also finds that she and Eric are distant relatives of Jesus Christ. This means that Kyle and Eric are related...
- ... and Eric is Jewish.
-OR-
- Kyle's family is related to Jesus, while Eric's family is related to Judas...
- ... which makes Eric Jewish anyway.
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
The Never Never Theres
"It almost seems like you could live forever there."
"That's the point. Time stops in Never Never Land."